Left 4 Dead (Short Film) Review

I've decided to start writing reviews on independent films I find on YouTube. There's a lot of great talent out there, and I'd like to showcase some of it.

Hahaha, just kidding. Writing with consistency is for chumps.

The film in question: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9WqzwhNnL8U
Early in 2007, I heard that Firefly (of the Pure Pwnage community) was making a zombie film from my friend Dan (who Firefly was seeking help from apparently). The updates trickled in until tonight, I finally saw the film.
To quote my favourite reviewer Ben Croshaw "This is the part where the reviewer talks about the plot to put off having to make any valid points", only I'm not going to do that because the plot is little more than a premise. Infection ravages the world, people start turning into "zombies" a la 28 Days Later. Also, some people shoot bullets and unconvincingly shout "FUCK FUCK FUUUUCK".

Left 4 Dead takes very little variation from the zombie formula. It starts off after the pandemic takes hold and follows a rough gang of survivors with mysterious proficiency in the use of big fucking handguns. Therefore, as George Romero owns the genre, there's little to praise here in terms of creativity plot-wise. That is not particularly the director's fault, the zombie genre has been done to death (don't pardon the pun, its a fucking hilarious pun) from every angle. The film never gives the zombies a sense of threat. Never do I feel like the protagonists are in trouble. Usually in zombie movies, there's either a horde of zombies or the zombies are fast and strong. In Left 4 Dead, the zombies lumber so off-balance and look so drug-fucked that a solid kick to the chest looks like it would break them in half, leading me to the acting.

The acting in this film was not terrible. Neither was it good. It was fine up until about 2:30 in when "CC" (played by the wonderful Cecilia Tan) runs along the sidewalk up to her cohort. There's no sense of immediate danger, but CC seems to be holding her gun in such a way that would suggest she could get attacked by the fucking ground. We later find out there are zombies in front of her. Logic dictates that if there is an enemy in front of you, you would hold your weapon appropriately. It takes an extra second to swing your arm up, steady yourself, and fire, than it does when your gun is already up. But the logical fallacies don't end there.
When CC reaches her fellow slayer, he takes out a zombie standing against a power pole (this is the first example of fantastic makeup and effects which I'll get to). If you're standing around waiting for someone, why would you let some zombie casually lean against the power pole across the road from you?
Cut to 2:54, a woman is leaning against a wire fence seemingly taking cover. Behind a wire fence. Meanwhile her zombie-killah friends stand out in the open popping off rounds into the off-screen unliving. The only time this scene changes it for (what I thought was a brilliant shot) a second of blood exploding at the camera. Other than that, its just a bland shot of four people shooting guns. There was a lot of potential for this scene to create tension in preparation for the next scene in the warehouse, but it went to waste.
Next, the warehouse. Zombies waddle in one by one and are easily picked off. This scene was set up like it was going to be a stand-off, with the main characters standing defiantly in the middle with their guns raised. A guy stands there while his fingers are fucking bitten off by his former friend-turned-hellish-minion who bears a striking resemblance to Amber Benson. He stands there like a mute with a Keanu Reeves-esque (that is to say totally emotionless) facial arrangement while his fingers get eaten. Then he bitch slaps her and kicks her in the ovaries, presumably to prevent her from having zombie offspring. Now, if that was me, the second she got within arm's reach I would've taken half of her face off. This scene might've evoked more emotion if the guy looked like he cared about what his friend had become, but no. More wasted potential.
Then we find out Baldy is deaf as he gets ambushed by two or three zombies who burst through the door behind him. What follows is CC backing into a corner half-smiling, which I suppose was meant to be a look of disgust, depression and a dash of "holy-shit-what-the-fuck" and a man putting a bullet through his head. Cut, that's a wrap.

The effects and makeup in this movie is fantastic. In fact, the only thing that made this film above average was the editing, which rings true to my suspicions that Firefly is a brilliant editor, an Adobe Premiere guru, and possibly the reincarnation of a wizard.

Left 4 Dead was an entertaining short film but only came through in post-production. An ancient concept, a mediocre screenplay and sub-par acting made me feel like I was watching Uwe Boll. Uwe Boll.

TLDR: 3/5
Good for a directorial debut.

PS: I welcome your defence or rebuttal.